Dave’s ask reminded that this video has been sitting in my drafts folder for a month.
In case you didn’t know, Nick Carter and Jordan Knight have left their own boy bands behind to create super man duo Nick & Knight. This is a great name. Great job, everyone. Sometimes the simplest answer is the right one.
I do sort of wonder what the other members of supergroup NKOTBSB have to say about this. Like, this seems even more insulting than going solo. At least when you go solo you can be like, “I just want to make all the creative choices myself!” This feels a lot more like telling Brian Littrell there’s no room in the car, even though he said he wouldn’t mind sitting in the middle.
I mean, I think the members of NKOTB are doing fine. Jonathan is selling real estate, I think? Donny is acting and also that Wahlburgers cash is flowing like sparkly rosé. [Editor’s note: Wahlburgers’ sweet potato tater tots are very soggy.] Danny is aging real well, so he’s fine and Joey is acting. SIDE ANECDOTE: one time I went to a super fancy magazine launch party and Joey McIntyre was there and he was wearing a really bad scarf and it is true what they say about not meeting your idols, because when you meet them they’ll probably be wearing some super unattractive accessory that makes you realize you spent your formative years lusting after a perfection that does not exist. ANYWAY, that was a bummer.
I don’t know what BSB are up to, because I’m afraid to look it up. If you know and it’s sad, please don’t tell me.
BUT BACK TO THESE TWO MEN. I love Jordan Knight, even though there are a lot of things working against him.
1. He was on that celebrity big brother show on VH1 and he came off looking like a super creep. Like a horrible scarf in human form.
2. He once released a remix to his song Give It To You called the 95S remix and it’s like he’s never heard of loyalty? He grew up on 93. I just feel like if you can’t be loyal to the fucking Expressway, what can you be loyal to, you know?
Ok, I guess that’s it, but it’s a lot.
Nick Carter. NICK CARTER. I don’t have a lot to say about him, because while I loved the Backstreet Boys as a teen, I was ride or die NSync. I did try to get tickets to their show at The Fleet Center, but they sold out too fast and we ended up going to see Detroit Rock City to make ourselves feel better. FYI, that is just about the worst movie to see to make yourselves feel better about missing out on a concert. Oh well, I saw the No Strings Attached tour twice, so IT’S FINE.
ANYWAY, this is a bumping pop jam. I am very into it. Like many great pop jams before it the lyrics are laughably bad and kind of mean spirited. The gist of the song is that Nick and/or Knight’s special friend is leaving them behind and they think this is bullshit. Mostly though the song is literally just begging their ex to fuck them one more time before they leave. Dignity. Always Dignity.
My favorite lyrics are these:
Don’t you remember?
Just how I made you feel
the night you came home crying cause you crashed your car
Yiiiiiiiiiiiiiiiiikes. The first two lines definitely make it seem like they’re going to bring up something sexy. Like, hey remember that orgasm that one time? Pretty good, right? Then he goes and brings up the multiple car accidents? Low blow. My guess is they DO remember how you made them feel and it was ‘pretty bad about themselves.’
So, yeah, good pop song.